Babies Don't Keep

Song for a Fifth Child
by Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo.
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs;
Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
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I have fond memories of my Mom quoting the last two lines of this poem to many young mothers as I was growing up. Thus I was hardly surprised when she quoted them to me just a few weeks ago.

Except for 1 room, I have conquered the battle of "How did it get this bad?!?!" I'm not saying my house is spotless. It's just not actually embarrassing any more. I am still debating how clean I should work to keep it continually. While the above poem is true--my girls will he little for only a short time--it is also true that I can't enjoy them if CPS takes them away because of our atrocious living conditions. (This was never a concern in reality.)

Obviously, I need to wash dishes and laundry, put away both when they're clean, cook wholesome meals (which necessitates grocery shopping), clean the bathrooms occassionally, and at least contemplate vacuuming/mopping. So where do the important things end, and the inconsequential begin? What things, if left undone, should embarrass me? What things do I just need to stop apologizing for?

A work in progress

I've been trying to clean up our living room. This is a never ending battle since our kids play here, my husband sorts through our mail here, I fold laundry here. We live here.

But when I'm honest with myself, it is improving. The laundry on the couch is this week's clean laundry. Not last week's (or last month's). The floor is more clear than it was last week. I'm doing better at having our older daughter pick up her toys occassionally. Improvement is good.

Do I really want this?

Today I said goodbye to my students. That sounds odd because I've been on maternity leave since March. But today was the last day of school. I went in for the end of the year party, taking my girls with me. I told my students about the joy and pleasure it has been to teach them, work with them, nurture them, cheer for them at ball games...and then I told them I won't be teaching next year.

My students had mixed reactions.Some of them are genuinely disappointed. They like me and my teaching style. Some of them could care less who is at the front of the classroom. They might like me but would just rather not be in school. Others are happy to see me go. Our personalities clashed, and they still haven't learned the life lesson of deciding to get along with someone that you must work with.

I know I will miss them. I love my students. I enjoy my career. But I love my girls more. Even though our babysitter for the past 2 years was an amazing stay-at-home mom, I still hated leaving my little girl with somebody else all day, everyday. When we brought our second child home, I wondered how I would be able to do it again. I couldn't imagine leaving both of them to go back to the classroom.

So, I found some work I can do online from home. I packed up my teaching supplies. I said goodbye to my students and coworkers. And as of today, I am officially a stay-at-home mom.

Yes, I do really want this.

"Unproductive" Days

The past 2 days have been rather hectic. For some reason, schedules were off. Both of my girls are definitely schedule babies. They like it when things happen at the same time everyday. Since things were happening at all the wrong times, they were grumpy. I spent 2 days trying to not be grumpy, restore the schedule, and help them not be grumpy.

Translation: not much housework got done.

Now, thankfully I was able to do quite a bit of housework Monday, and my husband is very understanding about these things. However, by the time I woke up this morning, I was rather discouraged.

But while I was talking to my grandmother, she reminded me that the most important thing I do right now is take care of my girls. Yes, that does require at least a minimal amount of housework so that we can wear clean clothes and eat off of clean dishes. But in the long run, helping them through a rough day is far more important than having a spotless house. Thanks, Grandma.

The Dining Room

My dining room is a constant source of frustration for me. It is the first room we enter as we walk in the  front door, so it is easy to just dump our stuff on the table. Today, I finished cleaning that area. I realize that I must be vigilant in keeping it that way, but now I can maintain instead of needing to climb the mountain.

Entry area

I cleaned up the laundry area and entry way today. Including the time that I had to stop and comfort a crying Sophie or take Belle to the bathroom, it took me about an hour. Now I should be able to fold laundry on top of the dryer (a goal I've had since I managed to get the laundry monster off the couch). Also, I swept the tile at the front door and sorted through the stuff on the small table there. My hubby and I will have to work together to keep that orderly since he's generally the one who drops stuff there.

Hooray! One area done.

Next: The stuff on top of the freezer and taking stock of what is in it.

How did it get this bad?

I realized a few weeks ago that I really needed to clean our apartment. I could try to blame the mess on the fact that we have a new baby. But it was a mess before she was born. I could try to blame the mess on the fact that I was pregnant, working full time, and had a toddler. But it was a mess before school started this year. I could try to blame that mess on working full time and having an infant. But I think you realize these are definitely excuses at this point. What I need to do is just clean the place and work to maintain that.

 I tried to set up a schedule for cleaning, but it wasn't working! I was able to accomplish it some days but not others. Overall, the situation was not improving. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. Then I realized that I was not using the system that has worked for me in the past. Traditionally, I start at one end of our home and work my way toward the other. I only do basic maintenance or necessary chores eveywhere else until I get there. After I clean each room, I go back and maintain it as I clean the others. I got behind on this as I tried to work full time. I will keep up with it this time.

This time around, I'm starting at the front door and working my way toward our bathroom (the other side of the apartment). It will probably take me longer than I would like since I do need to care for my two little ones, but that's okay. The important thing is restoring order.

Okay, so I don't post very often. I would rather talk to people than type to no one specific. But my sister has been bugging me to post, so I'm posting. If anyone has ever wondered what the true chain of command in my family of origin is, that should tell you something right there.

I'll try to summarize that past few months for those who are still diligently checking my blog.

December: While my family had hoped to send my sister for a visit over the Christmas holidays, that idea never became more than that--a hope. So, Mom and I hastily boxed up gifts and paid way more than we normally would to send them to each other. I went ahead with the other plans like cooking a turkey and making the dressing from the family recipe. We even had a bit of Christmas with family in a modern way. On Christmas morning Matthew logged in to Yahoo and turned on the webcam. The view was me preparing Christmas dinner. My parents plugged their webcam into Dad's laptop, and we saw them prepping the vegetables in anticipation of making the same recipe that I was working on. Of course, by the time we actually sat down to dinner, they had been in bed for some time.

January: School started back up, but unfortunately some of teachers were still in North America. The sixth grade teacher had sprained her ankle and was unable to maneuver sufficiently to pass through security and manage her layovers. The high schoool English teacher came down with the flu only a day or two before she was supposed to fly back to Seoul. Both teachers were delayed by 2 or 3 days, requiring some interesting schedule adjustments all around. Furthermore, during this time, Matthew started teaching Jr. High Bible 2 days a week. Pastor Johnson, our Bible teacher, returned to the U.S. during the Christmas holidays to be with his wife who was having cancer treatments. (She has since finished her treatments and is doing well.) This added a whole dimension to preparing lesson plans for the week. Jr. High Bible has about 35 students in it. 35 more of anything to grade is always daunting.

Well, it's getting late here. I will try to post again tomorrow night, giving February and March news. After that, no promises, but I will make an effort to post more frequently.

An Interesting Saturday

Saturday Morning

Dec 2 was the "annual" meeting of foreign teachers to "ensure quality of education". It was a big waste of time. All they did was read the immigration law to us and then subject us to pointless speeches (that if you have an education degree, you've heard the contents of at least 3 times). Then, to kill time, they had a horrible excuse for a music group "perform". The whole event was insulting. I spent 6 years in college and earned a teaching certificate and 2 education degrees. The event was organized by a person who obviously has no clue about education--during the sessions she learned "Success breeds success." I could've emailed her that and saved 500 people a lot of time.


Saturday Afternoon

After the morning meeting, several of us went to Express Bus Terminal and went shopping. (Yes, it is a bus statation, but it has several floors, and the top ones are devoted to shopping.) I was inspired while we were there and bought several items to put together table centerpieces. We used them as gifts at our staff Christmas party.


Saturday Evening

Our staff Christmas party was Saturday evening. We had loads of fun. We had finger foods, sang Christmas carols, and had a gift exchange. It was a thoroughly enjoyable evening and helped make up for the wasted morning.

Time

I believe it will become evident that my spare time during the week is slim to none. I am only logged in to the site because my husband found a typo in a previous post. (Isn't it great to be able to go back and edit old posts?) So I thought I 'd send a line or two out into the void that is the internet.

Life here is progressing as it usually does. We came back from Thanksgiving Break to find the students just as thrilled as we were to face another day of school. Is it Christmas yet?

Oh, here's a wonderful thought for those of you who may be considering working in a foreign country--you are completely at your host government's mercy (or lack thereof). We were notified today that all "international teachers", meaning anybody on a work visa for the purpose of teaching, has to go Saturday, Dec 2 (yes, that is this weekend!) to a "seminar" from 9 am to 1 pm. If it is anything like last year, it will be a complete waste of time. I'll let you know about it later.

Facials

If you read Laura's blog, you know that she had a facial on Saturday. Well, I was the fellow teacher that accompanied her. It was great! The experience was incredibly relaxing, and my skin feels a little softer, too (but I'm willing to acknowledge that that effect could be entirely psychological). Laura and I have agreed that we are going to purchase their package deal that gives you a discount. We paid about $6 for our hour long facials. The package deal gives you 10 for $4 each. I'm looking forward to my round of facials.

Taxi Rides

Today is a prolific day for me--3 posts! This is what happens when there's no school for a few days.

Today I had my first taxi ride--ever. There's one for the baby book, Mom. Here in Seoul, if you have a group of 3 or 4 people, it is frequently cheaper to take a taxi to your destination than to ride the subway. Our taxi ride actually came out slightly more expensive, but only by about 100 won per person. (That's about $0.10.) I'm not going to give up the subway, because it is still the best way to get around when you're by yourself; but it was nice to be dropped off at my destination. That was worth the extra 100 won.

Math Words

As a math teacher, I feel responsible to teach everyone around me mathematics.

Okay, so not really. But it is fun to dispense information when possible. Since I can't hear your groans or see you rolling your eyes , I will probably do that regularly here.

So, lesson #2: Learn your prefixes.

In math and many of the sciences, we borrow words from Latin and Greek. So knowing some of the number prefixes from those languages are helpful. Here are the prefixes for 1-9. We will wait for a later lesson to go farther.

1 hen- or un-
2 di- or bi-
3 tri-
4 tetra- or quad-
5 penta-
6 hexa-
7 hepta-
8 octa-
9 ennea- or nona-

In situations where I have given 2, the first is the one most commonly used in mathematics.

Now, why do you need to know these? The most common mathematical situation is in the naming of polygons (2-D figures) and polyhedra (3-D figures). A pentagon is a 2-D figure with 5 sides. A tetrahedron is a 3-D figure with 4 faces.

Pampering Yourself

A few weeks ago, I decided that I wanted to do some things to pamper myself. My list included the following:

1. manicure
2. pedicure
3. facial
4. massage
5. having my hair done
6. getting flowers
7. being taken out to dinner

Those last 2 may seem a bit presumptuous, but as a married woman I can ask for things that single gals can't. Also, this list may make it sound like I want to spend a fortune; but here in Korea many of these services are much cheaper than they are in the U.S.

Thankfully, I have a wonderful husband who seems willing to oblige me with #6 and 7. I also have wonderful friends who are willing to help me with #1-5.

I managed to get a manicure on Thanksgiving Day. Remember, here in Korea it's not a holiday. So I went out with some friends and we got really good manicures for about $15. I found out that the same place will do pedicures. They did such a good job with my hands; I think I'm going to go back next week to let them give me a pedicure. Again, cheaper than in the U.S.--$25.

Our administrator's son is in the process of becoming an elite hair stylist, and I was in need of a trim. So on Friday morning I went over to the apartment that had been designated "Salon for the Day", and he gave me a trim and blow-dry/style. Out of curiosity, I asked him what his services would run if I were to go to him at a salon in the U.S. His answer totally amazed me--$180. There's no way I would pay that much to get my hair done. But I suppose enough people do, becuase these salons stay in business.

Math for Mom

My Mom read my comment on Roca's blog to "The Randomness of Life" and wanted to know, "What's a heptakaidecagon?" So I told her, it's a 17-sided polygon. Now, if my self-described math-impaired mother can learn this word, anybody can. I think I'm going to post other interesting math words for her regularly.

Have a nice weekend!

Thanksgiving

Yesterday was Thanksgiving, and it was a very good one. We enjoyed going over to Larry and Elizabeth's home to celebrate the holiday with them and most of our coworkers. We had a traditional meal that everybody helped make (we all brought one or two items). Though it wasn't exactly what I had as a child growing up, it was definitely a traditional American Thanksgiving and a welcome taste of home.

I recognized a few of the elements that I had felt were missing as I talked to my family last night online, and so Momma promised to make turkey and dressing with the trimmings when we return to the States in June. Grandpa promised to take me to Ruth Chris' Steakhouse. You better believe I'm going to take both of them up on that.

That's a verb?

Unfortunately, this story starts with a sad moment. One of students was misbehaving, and I rebuked him. He didn't seem to mind that I had had to reprimand him. So I asked him, "Doesn't it bother you when I constantly tell you to stop doing wrong?"

"No," he replied in all sincerity.

"That's very sad, " I replied. "It's sad that you are sinning and it doesn't bother you."

I was about to continue the conversation when another student says, "Sinning? This is a verb?"

The student sitting in front of the questioner turns and says, "Yes, it means 'to sin'."

"Oh, okay," replied the questioner.

Life is never boring with these kids.

What's that thing called?

Working in an ESL environment frequently means interpreting the student's version of English into a real meaning of some sort. The funniest times are when the student has gotten a word that means basically what they want to say, but without the nuance or with an added nuance. It is frequently a frustrating occurrence for the student, since I must determine what he is intending to say instead of what he is saying. Several days ago, one of my students presented me with this situation.

Student raises hand during homework time, and I acknowledge him.

"Mrs. Smith, may I go to my cupboard?" I was momentarily perplexed by this. I thought I knew what he meant, but I had to make sure.

"Where would you like to go?" I asked.

By the way, this is the same student that wasn't sure what class he was in at the beginning of the year.

"To my cupboard," he replied.

"What do you mean, your cupboard?"

"The place where we keep our things with the blue door." Now I was certain of what he was trying to say because at SCS the student lockers have blue doors.

"Do you mean your locker?"

"Yes, my cupboard," the student replied, apparently not even noticing that I had used a different word.

Locker, cupboard--same thing, right?

We'll see how it goes

I announced my webpage to my classes today (the school-related one, not this one). Most of my students seemed to like the idea. Some of them seemed impressed that I was computer literate enough to create a website, even if it was by using a blog service. Hopefully some of my students who frequently give excuses will now actually get something done. I'm not holding my breath on that one, but I can hope.

Where am I?

Seventh graders are famous for being clueless, especially during the first few months of school. Here in Korea things aren't any different. Our seventh graders were traumatized the first week of school. Apparently several went back to the sixth grade teacher during the first week and told her that seventh grade is very hard. Few though have managed to be as confused as one young man was about two weeks into school.

First some background. I give a homework check pretty much every day. Students are given a quarter sheet of paper with space to write their name, the date, the class name (Algebra 1, Geometry, etc.), and the section number. There are also places to put the answers to questions that are indicated on a transparency that looks like their homework check. To help, I typically write the section number on the transparency along with the problems that they are to give the answers for. The students are expected to know the other information--name, date, and class.

So, now back to the story. One day, I noticed that filling out the homework check was becoming automatic for most of my students, and I was pleased because that meant I didn't have to explain the process everyday any more. One student in the back row, though, had a perplexed look as he raised his hand.

"Yes, [insert student name]"

The student looked at me for a moment longer before responding, "What class is this?"

"When in doubt," I told him, "Check the cover of your book." So the student picked up his book and read the cover.

"Pre-Algebra?"

"Yes, this is Pre-Algebra." I wasn't sure what to think at this point.